Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Our Douchebag of the Month is a dirty hippy lawyer

Well, we needed a new Douchebag of the Month, but I am really torn on this one. One one hand, you can look at the guys career and it just screams "D-Bag" However, dirty liberal hippy lawyers do serve a purpose in this country. And no, I don't mean as fertilizer. They are the last forlorn hope of the obviously guilty. And on the off chance that someone of this ilk is innocent (has to be a 1 in 16,542,337 chance, right?) they might be the only ones willing to stand up and fight. And to make their case even more compelling, they frequently are fighting against an unjust and unfeeling government. I like that. However, rolling a turd in rainbow sprinkles does not make it a delicious pastry treat. So, decision made. I salute you, Ron Kuby, our "Douchebag of the Month".

From Fox News-NEW YORK — The sole surviving Somali pirate from the hostage-taking of an American ship captain arrived in New York on Monday, smiling for a gaggle of cameras and reporters as federal agents led him into custody to face charges in the attack.
Abduhl Wali-i-Musi was handcuffed and had a chain wrapped around his waist. His left hand was heavily bandaged from the wound he suffered during the skirmish on the ship two weeks ago.
The smiling teenager seemed poised as he entered a federal building in a rainstorm, but he didn't say anything in response to reporters' shouted questions about whether he had any comment about the pirate episode.
This skidmark is smiling because he is facing trial in the one country that has made being a captured high-profile criminal one of the safest career paths ever. Anywhere else and this dude would have been dancing a jolly jig from a yardarm about 5 minutes after being caught.
Wali-i-Musi is the first person to be tried in the United States on piracy charges in more than a century. He was flown from Africa to a New York airport and taken into custody ahead of a court hearing Tuesday.
A law enforcement official familiar with the case said that the teenager was being charged under two obscure federal laws that deal with piracy and hostage-taking. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the charges had not been announced.
The teenager's arrival came on the same day that his mother appealed to President Barack Obama for his release. She says her son was coaxed into piracy by "gangsters with money."
Yes, that would be an apt definition of "Pirates". Thanks Mom.
"I appeal to President Obama to pardon my teenager; I request him to release my son or at least allow me to see him and be with him during the trial," Adar Abdirahman Hassan said in a telephone interview with The Associated Press from her home in Galka'yo town in Somalia.
Ah, so it begins. A plea to be allowed to come to the US. How much you want to be that when Mom gets here, she will never want to leave? Any excuse to leave Somalia is a good excuse.
The age and real name of the young pirate remained unclear. The mother said he is only 16 years old and is named Abdi Wali Abdulqadir Muse. The law enforcement official says he is at least 18, meaning prosecutors will not have to take extra legal steps to put him on trial in a U.S. court.
She also said he was a "good boy" and just a little "high spirited". And, he always keeps his AK-47 clean.
The suspect was taken aboard a U.S. Navy ship shortly before Navy SEAL snipers killed three of his colleagues who had held Capt. Richard Phillips hostage.
Making him the luckiest Somali in the world. If he hadn't have turned bitch, his brains would be part of a Modern Art project on the walls of a lifeboat in the Gulf of Aden with the rest of his buddies.
The U.S. officials said the teenager was brought to New York to face trial in part because the FBI office here has a history of handling cases in Africa involving major crimes against Americans, such as the al-Qaida bombings of two U.S. embassies in East Africa in 1998.
Ron Kuby, a New York-based civil rights lawyer, said he has been in discussions about forming a legal team to represent the Somalian.
And so the Douchebaggery begins.
"I think in this particular case, there's a grave question as to whether America was in violation of principles of truce in warfare on the high seas," said Kuby. "This man seemed to come onto the Bainbridge under a flag of truce to negotiate. He was then captured. There is a question whether he is lawfully in American custody and serious questions as to whether he can be prosecuted because of his age."
Truce in warfare? Well. let's get back out on that lifeboat and give Wali-al-Dumbfuck a chance NOT to surrender.Kuby intrigues me, so at this point I had to go to the old stand by, Wikipedia...

Ron Kuby
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Born July 31, 1956 (1956-07-31) (age 52)Cleveland, Ohio Nationality United States Occupation Trial attorney Ronald L. Kuby (born July 31, 1956 in Cleveland, Ohio) is a criminal defense and civil rights lawyer, radio talk show host and TV commentator. He is currently hosting Doing Time with Ron Kuby on Air America Radio.
Contents [hide]1 Beginnings 2 Partnership with William Kunstler 3 Post-Kunstler Career 4 Radio and television personality 5 Testimony/Controversy during John Gotti Jr. retrial 6 Personal life 7 Pop Culture References 8 References 9 External links
[edit] BeginningsAfter his parents divorced when he was five years old, Kuby lived with his mother. At thirteen, he joined the Jewish Defense League under the influence of his father, a follower of Meir David Kahane. He would later defend El Sayyid Nosair, convicted of Kahane's murder as part of his conviction for conspiracy in the 1993 World Trade Center bombing.
So this guy defended, in court, the cowardly terrorist murderer of his Dad's hero? Sorry, if someone had killed Mickey Mantle or John Wayne, I would have done something different than offer to defend them in court, but that is just me, and thankfully my Dad had different heros.
In junior high school, Kuby was nearly expelled for publishing an underground newspaper critical of the school administration.[1] As a teenager, he visited Israel, but soon returned to the United States complaining of "anti-Arab racism".[2][citation needed]
Anti-arab racisism in Israel? Unheard of! The Middle East is the land of hugs.
After dropping out of college, Kuby briefly worked on a tug boat in the U.S. Virgin Islands, then moved to New England, and Kansas, where he eventually completed his degree at the University of Kansas.[3]
[edit] Partnership with William KunstlerWhile in college, Kuby interned with William Kunstler, a lawyer known for his defense of the Chicago Seven. Kuby earned his Juris Doctor from Cornell Law School in 1983.
From 1983 until Kunstler's death in 1995, the two worked together on civil rights and criminal cases. They represented Gregory Lee Johnson, Sheikh Omar Abdel-Rahman (head of the Egyptian-based militant group Al-Gama'a al-Islamiyya); Colin Ferguson (the man responsible for the LIRR shootings, who would later choose to represent himself at trial); Qubilah Shabazz (daughter of Malcolm X, accused of plotting to murder Louis Farrakhan of the Nation of Islam); Glenn Harris (a New York public school teacher who absconded with a fifteen year-old girl for two months), Darrell Cabey (one of the persons who assaulted Bernard Goetz ); Yu Kikumura, and associates of the Gambino Crime Family. During the Gulf War, they represented American soldiers claiming "conscientious objector" status. They also represented El Sayyid Nosair, assassin of the late extremist Rabbi Meir Kahane, whom Kuby's father had admired.
This guys client list is a Who's Who of scumbags. Petty criminals, child rapists, murderers, terrorists and deserters, very impressive.
[edit] Post-Kunstler CareerAfter Kunstler's death, Kuby continued the work of his late mentor. In 1996, he won a judgment of forty three million dollars against Bernhard Goetz. He also won nearly a million dollars for members of the Hells Angels motorcycle club, who were wrongfully arrested by the New York City Police Department. He won the 2001 release of two men imprisoned 13 years for a murder they did not commit, winning a judgment of 3.3 million dollars for the pair. He secured a reversal of a murder conviction for a mentally-ill homeless man whose candle accidentally caused the death of a firefighter. In 2005, Kuby won close to a million dollars for another wrongfully convicted man who spent eight years in prison. Kuby now leads the Law Office of Ronald L. Kuby, one of the premiere criminal defense and civil rights firms in New York City.[5]
OK, I have to give him his dirty hippy props for standing up for the little guy (even if that guy is the Hell's Angels). Still a Douchebag, but I won't spit in your face if we meet.
[edit] Radio and television personality Until November 1, 2007, Kuby co-hosted (with Curtis Sliwa) the popular Curtis and Kuby in the Morning program aired on weekdays from 5 to 10 am on WABC-AM 770 in New York City.[6] The show featured commentary and debate on current issues, and a Court of Kuby segment on notable legal cases and periodic "Shout Outs" to current and former clients.
He is also a frequent pundit and substitute anchor on Court TV. He and Sliwa once shared a short-lived midday television program on MSNBC.
Kuby has often claimed to be a Communist. However, Kuby's political beliefs moderated considerably after the September 11, 2001 attacks. Of Jewish heritage, Kuby has also said he is an atheist.
He is interviewed in Kevin Keating's documentary Giuliani Time (which is concerned with Rudy Giuliani's career).
Kuby was fired by WABC on November 1, 2007 as part of a plan to bring back Don Imus to morning radio, in place of the station's Curtis and Kuby in the Morning show. WABC program director Phil Boyce publicly stated that he did not intend to keep Kuby.
Kuby was surprised that he was the first casualty of Imus – "Imus makes a racist comment, they fire a civil rights lawyer, and Imus gets my job," Kuby said.[7]
OK, this is funny. Just plain funny. Irony anyone?
On June 3, 2008, Ron Kuby returned to the air with his own show. He was hired by Air America Radio to replace Randi Rhodes on weekday afternoons. Doing Time with Ron Kuby airs weekdays from 3 P.M. to 6 P.M. Eastern Time
So, Mr. Kuby will go on to defend this pirate, and probably save him from the death penalty (if that is even considered). People like Ron Kuby are a neccessary part of our society, but they are still douchebags.

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