Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Happy as a pig in...

Well America, it’s done. The President has signed the pork laden Spending…Errr..I mean Stimulus Bill into law. Everyone line up at the trough.
In case you were wondering where your future tax dollars will be going, I have a short list of some of the projects in the bill from .
Laurel, MS
Cost $99,600.00 - 2 jobs Created
Turns out this is nearly 100k to put doorbells in the residences of elderly Laurel residents. 2 doorbells in each unit. 1 at the door for obvious reasons, and 1 inside the unit for signalling distress. Seriously? How about we call it 3k and buy each of them an air horn to toot?
Austin, TX
Raul Alvarez Disc Golf Course: This project will develop a 36-hole disc golf course that will be environmentally and financially sustainable.
Cost $886,000.00 - 4 jobs created
Disc golf has to be the queerest sport ever. And if a Disc golf course was financially sustainable, some dirty Hippy company in Austin would have built it. Did you know that Austin has 7 disc golf courses already? Austin needs another disc golf course like it needs more waiters with Masters Degrees or pierced and tattooed Elementary School teachers.
Chula Vista, CA
Sunset View Park - dog park construction
cost $500,000.00 - 7 jobs created
500k for a Dog Park? What do dogs need besides some grass and a fire hydrant? They are going to spend all their time sniffing each other anyway, couldn't that be accomplished in a vacant lot?
Dayton, OH
Initiative to Reduce Prostitution-Off the Streets Program. This initiative would connect individuals involved in prostitution with resources to leave a life of prostitution. Beginning with emergency shelter and continuing with an array of educational
Cost $1,500,000.00 - 0 jobs created
This is sheer madness. Not only does it create no new jobs, it takes working women and makes them unemployed. And a Million 5 to do it? How many prostitutes are there in Dayton? Maybe we can just split the cash with them.
Los Angeles, CA
Solar LA Program
cost $2,160,000,000.00 - 31243 jobs created
OK, I can see some merit in this project. It does create jobs, and it uses sustainable energy. That is good. However, if projects like this actually generated money, they would have already been done by private industry. Remember private industry. It was the backbone of America before Socialism took over. Back when the government did not think it was smarter than American businessmen and women.
San Diego, CA
Downtown Quiet Zone
cost $20,000,000.00 - 0 jobs created
20 million dollars. Seriously? When I looked the detail up on this one, it basically boils down to changing train crossings to have lights and arms so that trains going through downtown are not required to blow their horns at every crossing. 20 million and no jobs? Screw San Diego, get used to the noise.
Albuquerque, NM
New Mexico Events Center, Hotel and Events Center and related infrastructure located in Downtown Albuquerque
cost $418,300,000.00 - 14000 jobs created
I liked this one until I saw that the hotel was a Sheraton. Shouldn’t Sheraton pay to have it built? Why am I paying for something that returns an investment directly to a private company? Isn’t that why they are in business? To build and operate hotels, right? Can I stay there for free?
Austin, TX
Boardwalk along Lady Bird Lake: The project will close a 1.3-mile gap in a heavily used pedestrian and bicycle trail system. The trail extension will improve safety and provide additional access to a major bike and pedestrian corridor.
cost $18,000,000.00 - 60 jobs created
A hike and bike trail? For 18 Million? Nice for all the Lance Armstrong wannabes, but not a sustainable job producer at all. Once it is built, all the illegals who built it will be out of work again. Not like they are paying taxes anyway.
Cidra, PR
Improve track and land for little league parking
cost $150,000,000.00 - 43 jobs created
This is a 150 Million dollar parking lot. For a Little League ballpark. Someone should be hanged for slipping this in here.
Seriously America, you are about to take on a tax burden that your great grand children will still not have paid off and you let every dirty politician sidle up and take a turn slipping their pork into this bill like the football team did to your slutty older sister on Prom night. Shame on all of us.

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